Yugioh! On the Set!
by burnsk8er
Summary: This is a Yugioh! fiction. It's about me, the director, and the cast. We're filming episodes of Yugioh. Why don't you come in and see what's going on?
1. Yugi's Temper

Disclaimer: [joey in puppy suit trots up] Ah, yeah. So long as ya understand that Evergreen don't even own Yu-gi-oh, let alone know that Yami Yuge is the pharaoh, then you's can read this. Or Spongebob... [camera turns on evergreen] Did we really have to make a disclaimer? [joey shrugs] [evergreen rubs her neck] MY neck hurts like hell...  
  
Evergreen sits at her desk with a smile on her face  
  
Evergreen: Hi, I am the author of this story. I was inspired to write a Yu- gi-oh fan fic because I was just watching Yu-gi-oh a few minutes ago and I read some fan fics. There are so very funny ones. I don't know if mine will be funny. I'll just write what appears in my head, alright? Ready? Wait... gosh! My friggin' neck! Any tips? Well, read the story first.  
  
Evergreen: Everybody set! Cameras speed, roll 'em and action!  
  
Yugi is in his living room watching a dueling tornament with Yami  
  
Yugi: *yawn* This is boring. Don't we ever do anything besides Dueling Monsters?  
  
Yami: No. [sits there and watches tv]  
  
Yugi: You sure you don't want to do anything else?  
  
Yami: Yes. [Gets up and goes towards the door]  
  
Yami: Where are you going?  
  
Yugi: I'm sick of this! You take over my body and tell me what to do! I am a big boy now and I can decide what to do all by myself. [reaches to open the door, but cannot reach the knob] Uh, a little help here?  
  
Yami: [laughs] You fool! Come back here and watch this tournament with me.  
  
Yugi: [gets mad] I said no!  
  
Yami: [folds his arms] What could you possibly do about it?  
  
Yugi: I... I... [thinks] I know what you did last summer!  
  
Yami: Gee Yugi, for a second there, I thought you were gonna say something less stupid than usual.  
  
Yugi: Okay, then I know what you were doing between takes! You! You...!  
  
Tea: Could we stick to the script, please?!  
  
Yugi: [takes off his millenium puzzle and chunks it at Yami] I quit! You no longer posess me! [jumps and grabs on to the door knob and manages to turn it, opening the door.] I hate you!  
  
Yami: No! Yugi! You will not survive out there with out me!  
  
Yugi: [tries to be sarcastic] Oh yeah, I won't survive. Now that you're be gone, I won't be able to duel with every other guy I meet. I'll just have to ignore strangers like normal people.  
  
Yami: [in horror] Yes!  
  
Kaiba: [sits next to yami and pats his shoulder] there, there. You need to learn to let go. And know that I am always here for you. I will always love you.  
  
Pegasus: [plays with yami's hair] Yugi's not worth it...  
  
Evergreen: ggrrr! Kaiba! You aren't supposed to be gay until chapter 3! Pegasus! I don't even know if you're in this fic or not! GET OFF! [clears throat] Sorry, for the interruption. Get used to it. Roll 'em!  
  
Yugi: You think you know everything!  
  
Yami: Because I do. I am the hot and ever so clever Yami! I know everything execpt who I am.  
  
Yugi: Oh yeah? Well I am the cute and ever so sweet Yugi! And I'm going to Joey's house! [tries to sound intelligent] Good day to you, sir!  
  
Evergreen flies down and picks up Yugi and takes him to Joey's house. Joey opens the door and evergreen kisses him and flies away.  
  
Joey: Who was that?  
  
Evergreen comes back.  
  
Evergreen: I am the mistress of pain, and right now, I got a pain in my neck and my hand and my back and my foot! [sigh] I'll stop complaining, now. I'm the director, writer, author, the big hooha.  
  
Joey: Would you get out of here? Stop trying to make this fan fic funny. I saw what you did earlier. You're not ruining this scene.  
  
Evergreen: Now wait a minute. This is my chance to tell you how much I love you, Jounouchi. I just wanted to tell you that you and I, we are alike.  
  
Joey: Oh yeah? [smirks]  
  
Evergreen: Yeah. We are both stupid, yet extremely cute puppy dogs. And we are both always hungry. And we're both really tall and...  
  
Yugi: That's very nice, Evergreen, but I would like to get on with the story. I think the audience are reaching for the back button!  
  
Evergreen: SHUT UP MIDGET! YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT! YOU'RE NOTHING WITHOUT YAMI!  
  
Yugi: Why don't you put yourself in the damn story so you won't waste any more time?  
  
Evergreen: I could do that, but that would just ruin the story. This YUGIOH not YUGIOH and Evergreen.  
  
Yugi: THEN SHUT YOUR YAP AND START WRITING THE STORY!!  
  
Evergreen gives Yugi a stern look.  
  
Evergreen: You're right. You are cute when you're mad, you know? Anyway, So... [starts typing]  
  
They decide to go to the arcade, where they meet Tea and Triston  
  
Tea: HI GUYS! MY BEST FRIENDS EVER! [hops up and down with pom poms]  
  
Triston: Hey guys. We were just about to leave  
  
Tea: [jumping up and down] I'm the new DDR champion! I was getting bored so I told Triston to come to my place and discuss our friendship and new cheers for you, Yugi. [shakes pom poms in Yugi's face]  
  
Triston: [puts Tea in a cage] There, that'll hold her. Anyway, what do you guys want to do?  
  
Tea: [muffeled] Guys? Guys! GUYS! [cage moves and jiggles around] You idiots! You don't just stick a hot girl like me in a cage!  
  
Yugi: Anything that doesn't involve duel monsters.  
  
Joey: Speaking of Duel Monsters, where's that Yami guy?  
  
Yugi: Sitting on his skinny ass, watching tv! And you know what's on that tv? DO YAH!?!!  
  
Joey and Triston: ... no...  
  
Yugi: DUEL MONSTERSS!!!!!!! CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT GUY?!!  
  
Joey and Triston: ... yes...  
  
Yugi: AND THEN! HE TELLS ME WHAT TO DO AND  
  
Kids draw their attension to Yugi and an employee approaches them.  
  
Employee to Triston: Please keep this child on a leash and escort him and the thing in the cage outside. You are making a scene!  
  
Joey: HEY! This "child" is my friend! And that thing is... [thinks] a present for you! [picks up the cage] Happy Birthday!  
  
Employee: [sniffs] Wow, you remembered...! You are the first person today to... [tears]  
  
Joey: Yeah! I'm such a sweet guy, ain't I? Now, this type of creature is called Tea. Give her lots of attension and praise. Make sure you listen to her opinions and don't let her watch any competitions or give her pom poms. She's especially fond of a yellow thingy called... Sp-sponge Rob? Sponge Rob.  
  
Employee: Yes, yes of coures. [sniff] I'll take good care of her. [gasp] I've never had a girl before![grins]  
  
Tea: [muffled] Please no! I'm not getting raped again! [cries] especially by an ugly, acne-faced, boy!  
  
Joey: and don't worry, she'll shut up eventually.  
  
Yugi is still throwing an anime fit  
  
Triston: [bends down to reach Yugi] Hey, we got rid of Tea. Maybe that will make you feel a little better.  
  
Yugi: Yes, a little. Those evil pom poms make me uncomfortable.  
  
Joey: Now, what's this about Yami? I thought he was cool.  
  
Yugi: YOU LOSER! HOW COULD YOU TAKE SIDES WITH THAT THING! HE DOESN"T EVEN KNOW WHO HE IS! WHAT HE IS!  
  
Joey: So?  
  
Girl fans: Yeah! So?  
  
Yugi: AND HAVE YOU SEEN HIS HAIR?! C'MON! GET A HAIR CUT!  
  
Joey: [mocks] And have you seen your hair? C'mon get a hair cut!  
  
Yugi: [gets mad] I thought you were my best friend!  
  
Joey: I am, but you need some anger management, kid. And maybe a little milk. It's annoying having sit down everything we talk to you.  
  
Triston: Let's go to ... that restaurant we always go to. What's it called again?  
  
Joey: Who cares? As long as they got something we can eat in there.  
  
Yugi: and as long as I can reach the table, I'll be fine.  
  
Evergreen: CUT! That's it for today, boys.  
  
Yugi: Finally! I'm so... tired [falls to ground]  
  
Girl walks on set: Aww! He's so cute! [looks at triston] is that your baby brother?  
  
Triston: No.  
  
[silence and blinking]  
  
Triston: [twiddles thumbs]  
  
Girl: [walks of set asking] Where's that other cute boy with the hair?  
  
I think this is the end of Chapter 1. I didn't want you guys to have to read too much. Plus, I need to get off for a game in 10 minutes! Well, let me just say that I hate Tea, obviously. I needed some way to get rid of her. Also, I love Yami! I just wanted to see what an argument would be like. I love cracking jokes at how short Yugi is, so yeah. Chapter two will feature the gang at that restaurant and Yami will be there, waiting for Yugi. Now, I realize this is not very funny, but you have to admit, it is interesting! Right? (Hint: nod your head or say yes) ~* Later days! 


	2. Yugi's Room

Everybody set! Roll 'em and...action!  
  
Joey, Triston, and Yugi are at the restaraunt.  
  
Yugi: [tears running down his face] I just want him to... just show me a little bit of caring.  
  
Joey: Aw, Yuge. [takes fries from his plate] I know how you feel.  
  
Evergreen: [eats the rest of Yugi's fries]  
  
Triston: Don't worry. It'll all work out.  
  
Joey: [drinks Yugi's soda] Yeah! I'll make sure of it.  
  
Evergreen: [eats Yugi's burger :9]  
  
Yugi: [sniff, sniff] You guys... are the best! [gets hysterical] [hugs Joey and Triston]  
  
Triston and Joey: OH MY GOSH! GET OFF OF ME YOU LESBIAN!!  
  
Yugi: o_o;; lesbian?  
  
Just then, Yami bursts in with Yugi's millenium item.  
  
Yami: Yugi, put this back on. Stop fooling around! [throws the puzzle for Yugi to catch]  
  
Joey: [whisper to Yugi] Don't take it.  
  
Yugi: [obeys Joey] No, Yami. [throws it back at Yami] Until you say you're sorry, and that you want to work as a team.  
  
Yami: Is that a challenge?  
  
Yugi: Oh, hell no...  
  
Yami: Let's duel!  
  
Yugi: _!  
  
Suddenly a tournament arena pops up out of the ground.  
  
Manager: Urgh, I thought I got rid of that!  
  
Employee from arcade: Hey, Tea, look! It's one of those things you were talking about!  
  
Tea: [still in cage] Yeah! GO YUGI! [can't see] GO! GO!  
  
Employee: [kicks cage] Bad Tea! Bad girl! Shut up or go to my room!  
  
Tea: [cries] no! Please, no!  
  
Employee: Good girl. [opens cage] You can see this match, even though something inside me is telling me this is a bad idea...  
  
Yami and Yugi step onto the platforms and life points are generated  
  
Tea: Oh no, there are two Yugis! Which do I cheer for? [thinks] [yells] GO YUGIS! YOU CAN DO IT!  
  
Yami: Thanks Tea, but I think Yugi's the one who needs the help, not me. [winks to please her]  
  
Tea: [gushes] okay Yami-Yugi. [cheers] GO YUGI! GO GO GO!  
  
Yugi: Tea, shut it! I don't need your help! [turns to yami] I don't need help! o_o  
  
Yami: Fine, but here are the stakes. If I win, you put back on your puzzle and life will be like it was.  
  
Yugi: But if I win, you will respect me and let me help you and work together as a team.  
  
Yami: Is that all you wanted?  
  
Yugi: [tears] Yes! I didn't want you to just be my gaurdian and the guy who plays for me whenever I duel, I wanted you to be my friend.  
  
Yami: Oh... well, I still want to duel. I haven't dueled in 2 weeks!  
  
Yugi: Yeah? Well, I want to take a break fo--  
  
Yami: NO! I live, breathe, and eat Duel Monsters! Now let's duel! For my first move, I play Celtic Gaurdian.  
  
Yugi: Umm... You're using my deck. The game is off. [gets down from platform]  
  
Yami: Man! I should have seen this coming.  
  
Yami comes off of platform. The arena is still standing there, tall as ever. Yugi puts on the puzzle.  
  
Yugi: Friends? [reaches out his hand]  
  
Yami: Friends. [shakes his hand]  
  
Tea: [comes over] Oh Yugi! [hugs yugi] [hugs yami] I'm so glad you guys made up.  
  
Yugi: Slut! I thought I told you not to touch me!  
  
Tea: But...  
  
Yugi: GET AWAY FROM ME! BITCH!  
  
Tea: I... I... [cries as Mai comes in]  
  
Mai: Oo! Temper, temper, Yugi. [pats Tea's shoulder] There, there Tea.  
  
Tea: No one loves me!  
  
Mai: [says in a I-do-not-care-way] Awww... that's too bad. [turns attension to boys] Well, it was nice seeing you guys again, but seeing how the diner is ruined, I think I'll go somewhere else to get some grub.  
  
Tea: Take me with you! [looks at the employee] Ah! no! He wants me... Please take me with you!  
  
Mai: Well then come on, doll cakes. I'll turn you into a whole new woman. [leaves with Tea skipping behind her]  
  
Joey was sitting in the booth with his head on his hands, Tristen had been circling his finger on the table, idly.  
  
Joey: Yuge, you wanna do somethin' else? This is getting boring.  
  
Yami: Yes, I agree.  
  
Yugi: Excuse me Yami, but he was talking to me!  
  
Yami: Yes, but I happened to agree with him.  
  
Yugi: Oh! So now you're a some kind of wise cracker?!  
  
Yami: I'm a wiser cracker than you'll ever be!  
  
Triston: Guys, guys. Relax. Yugi, breathe. Inhale... exhale. [Yugi breathe's] that's it. Now, how about we go back to your place and just hang out?  
  
They all get up to leave. As they go on their way to Yugi's home, they meet up with Bakura.  
  
Bakura: Oh, hello there! [looks up from reading his Harry Potter book]  
  
Yugi: Hi Bakura. We're just on our way to my house.  
  
Bakura: Sounds smashing! I'll come, too!  
  
They all go to Yugi's house and live happily ever after.  
  
Yami: Let's play a little game.  
  
Yugi: [whines] Please Yami, I don't want to be mean again. I don't want to play Dueling Monsters!  
  
Grandpa: Yugi! You gay little boy! Stop your whining! If I've thought you anything, it wasn't that!  
  
Yugi: Yes Grandpa.  
  
Grandpa: Now that's a good Yugi-mugi-poo!  
  
Joey: How about my game? I made this one up last week when I was really bored. We go around town and try to get as much free stuff as possible.  
  
Yami: ... can you be any more retarded?  
  
Joey: [sigh] Well, I was really bored and I'm really bored now. And Yugi has no food. And there's no plot or anything.  
  
Bakura: Oh, Joey. I thought it was a fine game.  
  
The bell in the shop rings. Grandpa goes to see who it is.  
  
Mai: Can I get a deck of cards for this young lady? [presents Tea]  
  
Grandpa: [wide eyed] Tea? Is that you?  
  
Tea is dressed in a (tad bit exposing) pink outfit, wearing shades. Her hair is flatened and she's carrying a notebook and pen.  
  
Tea: Uh huh. Bring out the boys and see how they like it.  
  
Grandpa calls the boys and they come in.  
  
Boys: Wow Tea! You look great!  
  
Tea: Thankyou for that very first compliment ever. So am I back in the gang?  
  
Bakura: I'm afraid not. You're dressed like a slut.  
  
Yugi: And you look like an even sluttier bitch than before.  
  
Triston: I'm sorry Tea.  
  
Tea: [sniff] I understand. I'll just go and buy hooked on drugs. There's nothing else to do.  
  
Grandpa: Good choice. That stuff works!  
  
Yugi: ... okay grandpa.  
  
Boys go into Yugi's room  
  
Yami: Yugi, you and your friends bore me and I will go to my labyrinth-ish home now.  
  
Yugi: Good bye Yami! [huggles]  
  
Yami: o_o;; Um, yes. [disappears]  
  
Triston: What happened? One minute you're biting his head off, the next he's your girlfriend.  
  
Yugi: I found that love and faith ...  
  
Joey: Oh no! Don't you start that BS, too!  
  
Yugi: But don't deny me when I say trust in the heart of the cards!  
  
Joey: What?  
  
Yugi: Let's duel!  
  
Joey: Why?  
  
Yugi: Because I said so, hunny. Now let's duel.  
  
Since Evergreen does not know any of the cards besides Dark Magician(kiss), Celtic Gaurdian(kiss), Time Wizard, BEWD, Koribo, Mystical Imp or Harpee Lady, she cannot give detailed duels. Therefore, we skip that part and tell you that Yugi won.  
  
Yugi: Did we just play Yu-gi-oh?  
  
Joey: Huh?  
  
Yugi: I mean Dueling Monsters?  
  
Joey: Yeah.  
  
Yugi: I love them cards again, damit!  
  
Triston: Hey, how about we watch that tape Pegasus sent you? Let's see if we can talk to him.  
  
Yugi pulls out the tape out of air and puts it in the VCR. They see Kaiba and Pegasus having a wine.  
  
Pegasus: Hello there, Yugi-boy. [looks surprised] I see you've kept the tape. [Kaiba is looking Yugi over]  
  
Yugi: Yes. This is interesting.  
  
Kaiba: Where's that Yami, of yours?  
  
Yugi: sleeping.  
  
Kaiba: Aww, sleeping. So you wouldn't mind a duel then?  
  
Yugi: Yes, I rather would mind! I suck without Yami.  
  
Kaiba: And I'm sure you'd suck hard...  
  
Pegasus: Uh! Yugi-boy! I advice you to burn this tape. Burn it. With this tape, we have the ability to come into your room right now.  
  
Kaiba: We do? [pops out of the tv] Nice place you've got here, Yugi.  
  
Pegasus: Kaiba-boy! Come back here! We had a deal!  
  
Kaiba: I don't need you Pegasus. Why don't you talk this out with your adoring fan, Duke.  
  
Duke pops out of no where and jumps on Pegasus  
  
Duke: Pegasus! [gives him a noogie] Whatcha doin?  
  
Yugi turns off the VCR and puts it on the every show channel.  
  
Joey: Heehee! It's Even Stevens! This episode is really funny.  
  
Kaiba: I forgot you had a dog in here. I was wondering what that smell was.  
  
Joey: Why you!  
  
Triston: Calm down, Joey.  
  
Sailor Moon comes on.  
  
Kaiba: AH! Sailor Moon! Sailor Mars is so hot...  
  
Joey: [mockingly] OH, I forgot we had a man-whore in here. I was wondering what that smell was. [watches tv] Wow... they are hot...  
  
TV: I'm Sailor Moon and I shall punish you with all that is girly, fuzzy and pink! I'm Sailor Mini-Moon and I shall punish you with the goodness that is wanna-be's, posers, and stupid pink-haired brats!  
  
Yugi: I'll change the channel.  
  
Triston: No wait Yuge, this is interesting.  
  
TV: I am Sailor Venus! I will kill you with my high heel shoes and my viciously evil chain of love! HIYA!  
  
TV: [gasp] Tuxedo Mask! Mask: I will punish you in the name of love!  
  
Kaiba: Ooo... [drools over Tuxedo]  
  
Yugi changes the channel  
  
TV: POKEMON! I'm gonna be the very best that no one ever was! [Yugi sings along] To catch them is my real test, to train them is my caaauussee. [Bakura joins in] I will travel across the land, searching far and wide! Each pokemon to understand the power that's inside! POKEMON Gotta catch 'em all! It's you and me... I know it's my destiny! Pokemon! OOOOOOOH! You're my best friend in a world we must defend! POKEMON! Gotta catch 'em all! A heart so truuuuue, our courage will pull us through!! You teach me and I'll teach you! (you'd better) POKEMON! Gotta catch 'em all! Gotta catch 'em all! POKEMON!  
  
Ash: Hey Misty! What pointless activities are we doing today?  
  
Misty: How about we go find some random girl to talk to and annoy and for Brock to fall in love with, as usual?  
  
Brock: Sure thing!  
  
Misty: And then Team Rocket will ruin all our fun and we'll hurt them!  
  
Kaiba: Mmm... how 'bout you come over here and I'll make it hurt...  
  
Shadows on the window accompanied with music. Everyone looks at it.  
  
Mai: Prepare for trouble  
  
Tea: and make it double!  
  
squirrel: [high-pitched voice]Yeah! make it double!  
  
Mai: to protect the world from devestation!  
  
Tea: To unite all peoples with our nation.  
  
Mai: to denounce the evils of truth and love!  
  
Tea: To extend our reach to the stars above!  
  
Mai! Tea!  
  
Team... team... [tea whisper to mai] what are we? [/] Mai: Mai and Tea blast off at the speed of light!  
  
Tea: Surrender now or prepare to ...  
  
Suddenly, Joey pounces on Tea.  
  
Joey: [talking in between punches] Would... you... leave us... the... hell... alone?  
  
Mai: Just adding a little pizaz, to your life, hun.  
  
Joey: Huh? I've got enough puhzaz as it is. A gay Kaiba is in the room, along with a strange Yugi and Bakura.  
  
Beaten up Tea: What's wrong with Bakura?  
  
Joey: Exactly!  
  
Evergreen: Whatever. It's way past our bed time. Everyone to bed.  
  
Suddenly night time and everyone is sleeping. Yami in Yugi's mind. Yugi on the bed on top of Kaiba. Joey and Triston sleep , sitting up on the side of the bed, side by side. Bakura is asleep on the couch. Tea is the closet with her spongebob plushi and Mai is alseep on Joey's lap. Um... on second thought, Mai is asleep on... Bakura's lap. Kaiba: Yugi? Yugi... Evergreen: CUT! and Print... [rubs temples] Kaiba: That's it for today Yugi. Yugi: [still clutched to Kaiba's body] Okay... Kaiba: You don't have to act this way anymore... Yugi: Okay... Kaiba: ... HELP?! Evergreen: That's it for chapter 2. I think it was funnier than the first, eh? The story is actually over, but I'm probably going to put a bit more. Or maybe I'll make another parody. If I do it'll be Spongebob. [pulls Yugi off Kaiba] Say bye bye, Yugi. Yugi: Huh? Where's my dil... Evergreen: Shut up! No more sexual jokes. My neck hurts. Yugi: I'll rub it. Evergreen: Thank you. Mmm, yes. I'm looking for that Ooh Ahh feel. 


	3. Some Drunk Fun

Behind the scenes Evergreen, Joey, and Tristan are eating the left over donuts.  
  
Evergreen to Bakura: Bakura, could you please bring the cast here? I'd like to talk to yall about something.  
  
Bakura: Sure.  
  
Joey: Don't talk with your mouthful [snatches my donut]  
  
Evergreen: [snatches the one in his other hand and eats it] :P ^_^ 3  
  
Bakura comes back with Yami, Yugi, Mai, Tea, Pegasus, Duke, Kaiba, Mokoba, Bakura, Yami Bakura, and Employee.  
  
Evergreen: Everyone, I want to make a few changes. Mokoba, I want you to be a part of this story. [smiles at him] Yugi taken an anger management class. And... less funniness. Okay? I think... and... I don't know. Go back to work [eats donut]  
  
Y. Bakura to Yami: What an idiot.  
  
Yami: [sigh] Tell me about it.  
  
Y. Bakura: Want to put alcohol in some coffee?  
  
Yami: [looks shocked] Yami! That's not good!  
  
Y.Bakura: Whatever. Since when did you become Miss Goody 2 shoes?  
  
Yami: Since I got my raise [walks away]  
  
Y.Bakura walks to the coffee machine and pours something into. Evergreen noticed, but thought that no one drinks coffee anyway since she's never seen the pot empty so she did not care. When all the donuts were finished she saat back on her director's chair.  
  
Evergreen: Alright everyone! Places! Roll 'em and ... wait... Mokoba, you are in the scene, too.  
  
Mokoba: But I was never in Yugi's room to begin with.  
  
Evergreen: You were brought there telepathically by your horny brother.  
  
Mokoba: [asks as he takes a position] Huh? Whore? Horny?  
  
Evergreen: ACTION! ~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
The morning light kisses Yugi's cheek and wakes him up. He sees Mokoba is awake and admires how beautiful everyone is when they're asleep and how lucky he is to not have to see Tea's face until he manages to open the closet.  
  
Mokoba: Yugi, what is... horny? Why is my brother horny?  
  
Yugi: You mean you don't know? Boy, I learned that stuff way back in... 1st grade.  
  
Mokoba: Is it something nasty? Because then I don't want to hear this.  
  
Yami wakes and He sits by Mokoba.  
  
Yami: I think it's time you've had... The Talk  
  
DUN DUN DUN....... Kaiba wakes up and wipes the drool from his face. He rubs his eyes.  
  
Mokoba: Kaiba! Big Brother!  
  
Kaiba: Oh! Mokoba! Big Brother's got to go take a shower. [gets up, bringing Yugi's bedsheets with him.]  
  
Everyone else wakes up.  
  
Mai: Oi, what was I doing here, again?  
  
Tristan: Being stupid.  
  
Mai: Oh yeah! [shakes her head]Now wait a minute! You shut up!  
  
Joey: Anyone up for breakfast?  
  
Evergreen: I am! [types] and suddenly there is a full course gormet breakfast spread out.  
  
Joey: This calls for some morning cartoons!  
  
Mokoba and Yugi and Evergreen: Oh goody! [turns on the tv]  
  
Joey: Hey look! It's us.  
  
Mai: Oh my! We... have a tv show?  
  
Yami: It's called Yu-gi-oh. [looks at Yugi]  
  
Yugi: I didn't know anything about this.  
  
Bakura: [hic] Geee, I remember thattt! It was on the 20... 21st. I remember doing that.  
  
Yugi changes the channel to Blues Clues.  
  
Yugi: That was too freaky. How about we just eat all this good food now?  
  
Everyone started to eat, when Grandpa called.  
  
Yugi: AH! Get out! Grandpa would kill me if he saw all you people here!  
  
Bakura: Grandpa? Boy, I haven't seen Grandpa in years!  
  
Yugi: Get out! Get out everyone butt Joey, Tristan and Bakura! Hurry! Help guys!  
  
Joey and Tristan threw everyone out the window.  
  
Joey: Now you, too, Bakura. [picks up Bakura]  
  
Bakura: Weee! Oh this looks like so much fun!  
  
Joey: I'm sure. [throws him out the window]  
  
Bakura: I forgot my Harry Pottaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrr!  
  
Joey: [picks it up and throws it down] You can have your stinkin' Mary Botharg! [it hits Bakura's head]  
  
Yugi: Joey, Bakura was supposed to stay.  
  
Bakura: [faintly] Let's do it again!  
  
Joey: Yuge, you'll thank me later.  
  
Just then Grandpa opened the door.  
  
Grandpa: o_o; Tristan, what are you doing?!  
  
Tristan: Nothing!  
  
Grandpa: O_o;; And what's on the tv?!  
  
Yugi: Blues Clues, Gwampaw!  
  
Grandpa: O_O;;And... wh-who is on your bed?! Oh my goodness! What is that I see oh the floor?! What's that scent?!  
  
Joey: Is there a problem Mr.Motou?  
  
Yugi: Ew! Gwampaw! Go take a showah and weave us awone! You scawey today... [shivers]  
  
Grandpa: Is this one of your retarded games? I see what's going on here! Don't you ever do this again in here! You are to do it in my room with the camera on.  
  
Evergreen: CUT! [looks at the coffe pot. It's half way full.]  
  
Evergreen: Yami Bakura! Where are you? [no reply] Do you think it's funny you've drunken all my cast members?! [still no reply] [scratches head] You guys never drank the coffee before anyway.  
  
Yugi: Where's Y. Bakura?  
  
Bakura: I loved him soo!  
  
Kaiba: That's really too bad. He was the best sex partner I've ever had.  
  
Mokoba: Sex partner? Ew! Big brother!  
  
Kaiba: o_O Sex? _! I mean... SecTIONALS secTIONAL parter. :D  
  
Evergreen: Here we go. You guys have something to do! How about it? Find Yami Bakura?  
  
All: Sure!  
  
Mokoba: [crying] I never knew... my big brother was a pervert! I... I always looked up to you! I never saw those b-b... [reads card] boners? What the fuck?  
  
Yugi: Hey, kid, their pretty hard to miss.  
  
Kaiba: Yes, Mokoba. Fuck...  
  
Evergreen: Go home! And be back prepared and ready for Chapter 4. We'll find Bakura, then. I think. My neck doesn't hurt so much anymore and this story is dying. [watches everyone leave] Yugi, get a stool or go out threw the doggie door.[he crawls through the doggie door. Joey follows] [^_^ at Joey; laugh at Yugi] 


	4. Backstage Fun

Evergreen: Okay, in earlier chapters, there were some actions that were supposed to be in BOLD. Well, it didn't come out that way, so it looks like normal typing. Until I figure out how to make it BOLD, all actions, every single one of them will be in these annoying brackets ~~[]  
  
[The cast comes back to the studio]  
  
Evergreen: Great news guys! I watched Yugioh today. I learned that Yami is a king and there is a lady who can see the past and future. I saw Marik and I learned that Kaiba is supposed to be a jerk.  
  
Yugi: Boy howdy! That's great news!  
  
Evergreen: So, remember what we all agreed to do? We are going to find Bakura.  
  
Tristan: Who needs him? We can go on with out him.  
  
Evergreen: Now, now Tristan. He is still a character we all enjoy.  
  
Tea: Why don't you just type something and make him appear. I never really agreed to go look for him and I'm sore from being in that cage.  
  
Evergreen: Fine, then no adventure for yall! [types and Bakura appears]  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
[Joey, Tristan, Yugi and Tea are lounging around the set. Joey is playing with that black thing that usually says something like "Take 1". Tea is rubbing her cramps and Tristan and Yugi are playing with Pokemon cards.]  
  
Tristan: Where'd you find these Yugi?  
  
Yugi: In the dumpster! I can believe anyone would throw these away!  
  
Tea: Ew, Yugi. If you found them in a dumpster then those cards really do suck.  
  
Mokoba: Attension Gentlemen and Evergreen! Kaiba and I have just created something that could cure our boredom!  
  
[Everyone looks up]  
  
Mokoba: Presenting Virtual Karoke!  
  
Yugi: Wow!  
  
Bakura: Oh! Good show!  
  
Tea: Oh. My. Gosh.  
  
[Everyone is looking at what looks like a pile of metal] [use quotations!]  
  
Kaiba: "It was all Mokoba."  
  
Mokoba: "Anyone wanna test it?"  
  
[No one moves]  
  
Yugi: "I'll do it!"  
  
Kaiba: "Sorry, but you must be atleast this high." [holds hand at his waist]  
  
Yugi: [tears] St-stop making fun of me!  
  
Yami: Don't worry Yugi. Do the YUGIOHOOH thing with the light and I'll make you taller.  
  
Yugi: Silly! We don't have to do that anymore! [switches and Yugi is suddenly taller] Ta da!  
  
Tea: Oh, Yugi! Stop doing that! You look so unattractive when you become suddenly taller, sharp as nail hair, deep voice, beautiful eyes... and... oh.  
  
Yami: Funny, you made me almost want myself with that description.  
  
Kaiba: [drool] It worked on me.  
  
Tea: Hmm... you're right! I was wrong, as usual. You are hot. You are hot. You are hot. Umm... [dies from brain overload, for she couldn't think of anything to take back her retarded comments]  
  
Joey: I want to try it too!  
  
Tristan: And me too!  
  
Mokoba: [cleaning up his brother's drool] That's great. Just step into the portal. [gives Kaiba a bib]  
  
[They step in and hoods cover their face]  
  
Mokoba: Turn it on, big brother!  
  
Kaiba: Mmm, gladly.  
  
Evergreen: [sweatdrops] Aheh, let me flip the switch.  
  
Kaiba: You can flip my switch anyday...  
  
[The boys are suddenly taken to a retro colored room{they see because the hoods cover their face and they see the image}. Music started to play]  
  
Machine: Song... W-w-w-work It. By.... Missy-issy Elliot-t-t. Engage in singing... now  
  
Yugi: I don't know this song!  
  
Joey: This song is great!  
  
Tristan: No, it's sick and stupid.  
  
Joey: DJ please! Pick up your phone I'm on the request line!  
  
Song and Joey: Is worth it? Let me work it I put my thang down flip it and reverse it.  
  
Yugi: Ah! Change the song! [covers his ears in horror]  
  
Yami: [gasps at lyrics] We have young people in this machine! [manages to block Yugi's ears with toilet tissue]  
  
Machine: Engage in dancing... n-n-n-now. [lights appear and mist]  
  
[Meanwhile outside of the Machine; Kaiba is back to normal]  
  
Bakura: Is it supposed to make that sound?  
  
Machine: P-p-p-put m-m-my thang down fli-p-p-p it and ::rumble rumble:: [begins to steam]  
  
Mai: Hahaha! They look like idiots in there! Squirming and jigglying while the machine explodes! You can hear Yugi crying! [laughs more]  
  
Evergreen: Are you sure this thing is safe?  
  
Mokoba: Um... [whispers to Kaiba] [Kaiba nods his head] Yes! :D  
  
Evergreen: I don't trust you. You're looking a little too cute, today. [unplug machine] Besides, the machine was really making that song sound bad.  
  
[The hoods are raised and Yugi sits in a chair and wipes his tears. Joey is still dancing and Tristan walks stiffly away from the machine]  
  
Evergreen: Kaiba, get rid of that disgrace you call an invention and everyone else, get ready to shoot the next episode. Yugi, wake up Grandpa. Tristan, revive Tea. Now, in this scene, Yugi and Mokoba are playing in the park and Kaiba comes around. If you've read your scripts, you know what to do. PLACES!  
  
[Suddenly, men in black suits smash into the studio]  
  
Man: Ms. Evergreen?  
  
Evergreen: We're a little busy here, dear.  
  
Man: Ms. Evergreen, the WB has sent us to warn you that ratings have dropped. Either make some sense or you're fired.  
  
Evergreen: Would you like some coffee?  
  
Man1 and 2: Oh, sure!  
  
[Evergreen pours them both a cup of coffee until the once half full kettle was empty. The men drank]  
  
Man1: That was good!  
  
Man2: MMMM! You said it, brotha!  
  
Evergreen: Well now. Is everything here just peachy?  
  
Men: YES  
  
Evergreen: No hard feelings?  
  
Men: NO  
  
Evergreen: Thank you for your visit. Buh bye!  
  
Men: Goodbye! [The leave gayly(happily)]  
  
Kaiba: What was that about?  
  
Evergreen: Kaiba, everything is under control [sits in her directors chair] Joey! Scene Marker!  
  
Joey: Oh yeah! [snaps it infront of camera] heheh!  
  
Evergreen: and action!  
  
To be continued... 


	5. Go to School and Quit

[Everyone has taken their place on the park scene. Evergreen has a pile of used tissue next to her chair because her nose has been running all day long. Mokoba is staring at it.]  
  
Mokoba: [says under breathe]That's so gross.  
  
Yugi: Mokoba! Catch the ball! [throws ball]  
  
Joey: [is ready to laugh because he expects the ball to his gazing Mokoba in the head]  
  
[The ball is up in the air and lands 1 foot away from Yugi]  
  
Yugi: Don't worry! Let me try again! [picks up ball and throws it] Oof! [This time it lands 1.5 feet away]  
  
Tea: [quiet] Psst! Mokoba!  
  
Mokoba: Huh?  
  
Tea: It's your line now.  
  
Mokoba: I didn't read the script.  
  
Tea: Shhh! Don't let Evergreen know! Just make up something. [non-quiet] YUGI! YOU CAN DO IT! THROW THAT BALL!  
  
Mokoba: Uh... nice throw Yugi. [looks at the ball] Did you actually throw it or did you drop it accidentally?  
  
Yugi: [tearing up] I... I threw it!  
  
Mokoba and Joey: OH MY GOSH! AHAHAH! [laughter laughter laughter! Evergreen and Tristan join in]  
  
Yami: Yugi! Don't be weak! Suck up those tears. I will help you throw that ball. [they switch] Alright Mokoba. I'll show you how to really throw a ball.  
  
[Just then, Kaiba comes, looking for Mokoba. He's mad to see that he's playing with Yugi. Yami throws the ball and it hits him in the head]  
  
Kaiba: YUGI! [pops the ball and throws it at Yami] Stay away from my brother!  
  
Yami: Your brother wanted to play catch, so I played with him.  
  
Mokoba: He's my friend!  
  
Kaiba: He's a creep!  
  
Joey: [sarcasticly]Oh yeah, Yugi's the creep and you're the one masterbating off set.  
  
Yami: Let's settle this with a duel! If I win, Mokoba can play with whoever he please. If you win, then you can decide if he's to play with me or not!  
  
Kaiba: [not being perverted] Hmmf, you're on!  
  
[Arena pops out and the boys get on the platform. Blah, blah, blah. Yugi blah. Kaiba blah. Yugi wins!]  
  
Kaiba: Fine, but it's time for Mokoba to go to school anyway. [walks off with Mokoba]  
  
Bakura: Holy crap! We've seem to forgotten to go to school!  
  
Yami: What is this school you speak of?  
  
Joey: It's a stupid place to learn stupid things. Yuge, turn back to your old, self. If we don't go to school, Bakura will have a nervous break down.  
  
Tea: School can be lots of fun, you know? I love learning new things and hanging out with my friends!  
  
Tristan: Tea, you aren't coming. Remember? You got suspended.  
  
Tea: For what?  
  
Tristan: For being the most annoying bitch I've ever seen. Now go away!  
  
[Tea sulks away and the boys go to school. They entere the class and Kaiba, Mokuba, Mai and a few other people are there.]  
  
Teacher: I'm very disappointed in you all! You mean to tell me that you've forgotten to come to school?  
  
[They all nod their heads shamefully.]  
  
Teacher: Tsk Tsk. Even my star pupil. Yugi. I expected more of you. [sigh]  
  
Yugi: [thinking] don't cry! don't cry! [says] I'm sorry Miss Teacher!  
  
Teacher: POP QUIZ! MUHAHAHA!  
  
[They all moan. The teacher passes out the papers. The quiz is about chemical reactions and how to balance them]  
  
Joey: Crap. I don't remember learning any of this! Eh, Yuge? You got any answers?  
  
Yugi: I know I'm doing the wrong thing, but I think I'm going to switch with Yami. [switches] Yami: ... [raises his hand] What are these elements you speak of?  
  
Teacher: Yugi! Your sudden growth spourt has made you irresistably hot! You get an A! [swipes paper and gives him an A]  
  
Joey: Eh! What about me? I'm irresistably hot too! I'm cute! [puts on doggy costume]  
  
Mai: [love eyes] GIve him an A! Give him an A!  
  
Teacher: Seeing as practically all of you boys in here are just adorable, I'm cancelling the quiz and we're having a beauty contest. The contest will determine your grade.  
  
Bakura: What the hell is going on here? We skip school for a couple of days and suddenly everyone's odd and queer!  
  
[Everyone lines up]  
  
Teacher: (yami)Yugi, A+; Joey, A+; Kaiba, A-; Mokoba, C; Bakura, A; Tea, F; Mai, A; Weevil, F-; Rex, D; Aww... Duke. You get an A+ up there with Joey and Yami! Of course, Joey is still the best out of all 3 of you.  
  
Duke and Joey and Yugi: ^_^ 3 Teacher: Oh yeah. Tristan, we forgot all about you. You get a... B. For those who passed, good job! For those who fail, I suggest you go see a plastic surgeon immediatly. I will write you passes to go home and see one. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ [The students who pass go to PE, now.]  
  
Coach: Okay, wimps! Basketball season has started. And you know what that means!  
  
All: ...?  
  
Coach: Duel Monster tornaments have started, as well!  
  
Evergreen: You know what? This asylum you call school really IS a stupid place to learn stupid things! Cast, CUT! I want you guys to go home and get some REAL education. You bunch are a desgrace to this fan fiction.  
  
Joey: You know what? We quit!  
  
Rest: Yeah!  
  
Duke: I didn't have what? 2 words?! Where's Pegasus?  
  
Pegasus: I only appeared in one scene! Come Duke!  
  
Evergreen: You can't do this to me! I'm the director.  
  
[They all begin to walk out the door, Yugi going through the dogie door]  
  
Evergreen: BUT I'm still the author you know! This story isn't over yet! I swear it! [sigh] -_- This means they will all begin to live their normal lives. But I'm still the author! [grin] I can still make their life as hectic as I please! 


	6. Goodbye! a rather pointless ending

[Everyone has taken their place on the park scene. Evergreen has a pile of used tissue next to her chair because her nose has been running all day long. Mokoba is staring at it.]  
  
Mokoba: [says under breathe]That's so gross.  
  
Yugi: Mokoba! Catch the ball! [throws ball]  
  
Joey: [is ready to laugh because he expects the ball to his gazing Mokoba in the head]  
  
[The ball is up in the air and lands 1 foot away from Yugi]  
  
Yugi: Don't worry! Let me try again! [picks up ball and throws it] Oof! [This time it lands 1.5 feet away]  
  
Tea: [quiet] Psst! Mokoba!  
  
Mokoba: Huh?  
  
Tea: It's your line now.  
  
Mokoba: I didn't read the script.  
  
Tea: Shhh! Don't let Evergreen know! Just make up something. [non-quiet] YUGI! YOU CAN DO IT! THROW THAT BALL!  
  
Mokoba: Uh... nice throw Yugi. [looks at the ball] Did you actually throw it or did you drop it accidentally?  
  
Yugi: [tearing up] I... I threw it!  
  
Mokoba and Joey: OH MY GOSH! AHAHAH! [laughter laughter laughter! Evergreen and Tristan join in]  
  
Yami: Yugi! Don't be weak! Suck up those tears. I will help you throw that ball. [they switch] Alright Mokoba. I'll show you how to really throw a ball.  
  
[Just then, Kaiba comes, looking for Mokoba. He's mad to see that he's playing with Yugi. Yami throws the ball and it hits him in the head]  
  
Kaiba: YUGI! [pops the ball and throws it at Yami] Stay away from my brother!  
  
Yami: Your brother wanted to play catch, so I played with him.  
  
Mokoba: He's my friend!  
  
Kaiba: He's a creep!  
  
Joey: [sarcasticly]Oh yeah, Yugi's the creep and you're the one masterbating off set.  
  
Yami: Let's settle this with a duel! If I win, Mokoba can play with whoever he please. If you win, then you can decide if he's to play with me or not!  
  
Kaiba: [not being perverted] Hmmf, you're on!  
  
[Arena pops out and the boys get on the platform. Blah, blah, blah. Yugi blah. Kaiba blah. Yugi wins!]  
  
Kaiba: Fine, but it's time for Mokoba to go to school anyway. [walks off with Mokoba]  
  
Bakura: Holy crap! We've seem to forgotten to go to school!  
  
Yami: What is this school you speak of?  
  
Joey: It's a stupid place to learn stupid things. Yuge, turn back to your old, self. If we don't go to school, Bakura will have a nervous break down.  
  
Tea: School can be lots of fun, you know? I love learning new things and hanging out with my friends!  
  
Tristan: Tea, you aren't coming. Remember? You got suspended.  
  
Tea: For what?  
  
Tristan: For being the most annoying bitch I've ever seen. Now go away!  
  
[Tea sulks away and the boys go to school. They entere the class and Kaiba, Mokuba, Mai and a few other people are there.]  
  
Teacher: I'm very disappointed in you all! You mean to tell me that you've forgotten to come to school?  
  
[They all nod their heads shamefully.]  
  
Teacher: Tsk Tsk. Even my star pupil. Yugi. I expected more of you. [sigh]  
  
Yugi: [thinking] don't cry! don't cry! [says] I'm sorry Miss Teacher!  
  
Teacher: POP QUIZ! MUHAHAHA! [They all go on their way to someplace. Duke goes home. Pegasus goes home. Kaiba and Mokoba go home. Weevil gets kicked to the other side of the planet for being so darn annoying! Rex goes back to Dinotopia or where ever he came from and the main gang are together, with Mai.]  
  
Tristan: This really sucks, now we've nothin' to do.  
  
Joey: Anyone else hungry?  
  
Tea: If Evergreen were here, she'd have the whole restaraunt with her already.  
  
Joey: That's one good thing about her.  
  
Mai: She's too bossy, though. And I was getting really bored with her.  
  
Bakura: And that was really mean, making fun of Yugi like that.  
  
Yugi: But it's alright now because she's gone.  
  
[They arrive at Yugi's house.]  
  
Mai: I've got to go. Bye guys. Bye Joey ^_~.  
  
All: Bye. See ya, Mai.  
  
Tea: I'm going to go home before lighting strikes me, again.  
  
Yugi: Well, it's just us guys. What do you want to do?  
  
Yami Bakura: Let's go kill something.  
  
Yami Yugi: Let's go trade duel monsters.  
  
Joey: Let's go eat.  
  
Tristan: ...  
  
Yami B.: Suggest something, you idiot!  
  
Tristan: Well, I can't think of anything to do that would fit my almost non- existant personality.  
  
Yugi: Let's watch TV. Come on in, guys.  
  
[They enter Yugi's home. Yugi turns on the tv]  
  
Yami: Its... It's that Yu-gi-oh again.  
  
Joey: Ahah! I can see myself! :D  
  
Tristan: Is that the name of the show we were doing?  
  
Bakura: This is quite interesting.  
  
Tristan: Well if you ask me, it's all pretty stupid.  
  
[Grandpa comes in with pizza]  
  
Grandpa: Hi, boys! I just wanted to give you an end of story congradulations!  
  
Evergreen: [eating pizza] End of story?! Whaddaya mean?  
  
Grandpa: I mean this story is over once and for all! If you want us back, you're going to have to make more sense next time.  
  
Evergreen: [tries to swallow pizza] But I'm not creative at all! [takes another bite] If I make sense then it's copied from someone!  
  
Yami Yugi: You just need to trust yourself and make the story your heart has been dreaming of.  
  
Joey: Aw, Yuge, that was beautiful. [eats pizza]  
  
Evergreen: Well, I guesh you're right. [more pizza in mouth] My next story will be a murder mystery!  
  
Yami: I'm sure it'd be a very nice one.  
  
Evergreen: Yeah! [tries to make them fear her] So... so you'd better watch you back. [nods]  
  
Bakura: Okay.  
  
Evergreen: Because... you- you could be dead... next time.  
  
Bakura: Okay.  
  
Evergreen: And I'm typing it TODAY!  
  
Bakura: ... OKAY! Please end this already.  
  
Homer Simpson: Yeah! You'd better hurry or you're gonna miss OUR show. [eats pizza]  
  
Evergreen: Simpson? You're... you're my idol!  
  
Homer: THen just put the damn 'D End' sign!  
  
Yugi: I'll do it!  
  
T h ee nD  
  
[Evergreen and homer leave hurriedly with the remaining boxes of pizza and Evergreen bring Joey and Yugi along] 


End file.
